Spent the whole of last night crying and calling up many people, talking talking talking. Most of them encouraged me to follow my interest and go to TP because obviously, taking history and math again is not what i want. Lit and Econs might be interesting but in terms of lit, many others will have the upper hand as they took o lvl lit :(
I'm still 50:50. I think my choice is made, i just need to convince and assure myself once more. What they said about me is right.
"Deanna, you're too afraid to take risks. Why?"

Why? Good question. The only thing that makes me happy now is planning Fiona and my trip to ** and checking out Air tickets. Apparrently, it's dirt cheap if we book now.

Edit/ I think i cried more this week than i ever did the whole of last year. Amended. I hope i'm doing the right thing. I know people always say this esp when they go jc, but i'm going to study really really hard. Maintain a good GPA and go get my degree. I shall go Tp and be a nerd and loner 8) My parents have been soo supportive and i can tell that in actual fact they want me to take the 'proper' route and go to jc. But since they're putting so much faith in me, i shall really really strive to do really really well. I'm setting my sights on a much farther goal in the future. I will will will will get it.

Ediedit/ If i go poly. Am going to work for two months really hard and really try to save save save a lot so that i can fund the trip to ** on my own and pay for mom's airfare :) And start paying for all my meals and concessions passes for the next two months on my own!!


I love you, in a really, really big pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. So pick me, choose me, love me.